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Robert Payzant Jr. is a program coordinator at the Maine Prisoner Advocacy Coalition.
I am writing in regards to the neglectful and harming atmosphere that solitary confinement creates for those unlucky enough to find themselves there. It truly is a prison within a prison.
I spent more than 18 months in isolation. Separated from human contact and subject to inhumane interactions from those whose job it was to see to my physical, emotional and spiritual wellbeing.
I remember an ice cold cell, where I was given two sheets, a threadbare blanket and a worn-out mattress placed on a concrete platform.
I remember asking repeatedly for simple yet necessary items, like toilet paper and being ignored for hours.
However, they were quick to give us attention if we “acted up.” Negatively responding to disturbances only reinforced to all of us that behaviors, such as violent outbursts and self harm, were the only effective ways to get attention or to be heard.
I remember the noise, how it reverberated throughout the entire unit as other men in solitary succumbed to the madness they were driven to because of untreated mental health issues.
I remember the absolute silence, where my only company was my thoughts, my fears, my anguish. The noise in my head during those times was louder than all of the screaming and banging on the metal doors combined.
I remember having only one 10-minute phone call per week. Having to choose who to call and praying that they would be available because those calls came at the discretion of the guards.
I remember being in four-point restraint as I was escorted only a few feet down the hall to the shower. I was not guaranteed a daily shower as any privilege I was allowed came down to the “availability” of the guards.
I remember watching and listening to grown men break down mentally and cause self harm.
I remember men being extracted from their cells and upon their eventual return telling me of being put in a restraint chair, naked, and being maced on their private parts, and being left indefinitely in that state to suffer. It was left to the discretion of the guards as to when they were allowed to clean themselves off.
Now, Department of Corrections Commissioner Randall Liberty (whom I respect) will say these are outdated testimonies from seven or eight years ago. While none of these things were done right in front of him, his analysis of the situation is not correct.
In 2018, not even four years ago, I was placed in administration segregation due to an investigation that I was exonerated from two months later. During that time, I was psychologically and emotionally tormented and had no support whatsoever.
I was locked in my cell for more than 23 hours a day and when I had recreation it was in a secluded section of the unit where I was completely segregated. I didn’t see, let alone talk to, another human being. I was brought outside to a yard that was approximately 25 feet by 25 feet, brick walls on all four sides, where the sky above me was all but blocked out by several layers of fencing. I had nothing to do but walk in circles or do calisthenics, which I could have easily done in my cell.
I had no TV. No canteen privileges (other than stamps and minimal hygiene). One call per week. And the way I was treated by the guards, well, let’s just say that I went from being the Poster Boy of reform and re-entry to guilty and convicted in the mind of opinion. Everything I had worked for to recreate my identity was stripped away and I was forced to suffer alone.
I ask that it be acknowledged that solitary confinement is inhumane and that the Department of Corrections be forced to end this practice.