Parenting gone awry — the kids are not all right

Posted Nov. 18, 2011, at 3:21 p.m.
Last modified Nov. 19, 2011, at 5:09 a.m.

Julianne McCrery, 42, of Irving, Texas, plead guilty to the murder of her 6-year-old son, Camden Hughes, in September. Camden’s body was found under a blanket on a dirt road in South Berwick, Maine, on May 14, 2011.

The headlines are appalling, somehow more so in that they are from this newspaper: “ Texas mother arrested for allegedly killing son, 6, found along South Berwick road” and

“Police say mother was drunk and high when dog killed her daughter.”

And from elsewhere in the country: “ Wisconsin 11-month-old twins die after being left in bathtub” and “ Missouri mother jailed after 1-year-old found dead.”

Review headlines from 50 or 100 years ago and similar horror stories can be found. But statistics suggest a worsening trend. In fact, the United States has the highest rate of child abuse in the world.

According to a recent congressional report, a child in the U.S. dies from abuse or neglect every five hours. In 2009, some 2,500 child deaths were attributed to abuse. Death rates for children from abuse ranged from 4.05 per 100,000 children in Texas to 0.35 per 100,000 in New Hampshire. Maine’s rate was 1.46 per 100,000 children.

The U.S. national rate of death by abuse is 2.4 per 100,000. That’s about five times higher than that in the United Kingdom and 11 times greater than in Italy. One explanation for the high rate of child deaths at the hands of those who are supposed to be caring for them is that the U.S. lacks the social safety net found in Europe.

But there are other factors. One is that parents — both mothers and fathers — face increasing stress. They work harder and longer for income that fails to keep pace with costs. Their jobs demand more time and commitment — often time without compensation — than ever before.

And more parents are alone than ever before. About a quarter of U.S. children are being raised by single parents. In 1970, it was about 11 percent.

The unemployment rate for single mothers hit a 25-year high in the wake of the recession. Single mothers are more than twice as likely to be unemployed as married women and men, recent Census data reveals.

A mother who kills her child is an aberration and not a trend, but those mothers may be the proverbial canary in a coal mine.

Dean Crocker, president and CEO of the Maine Children’s Alliance, believes life-threatening child abuse and neglect are getting worse. The lack of money, he said, is one of the biggest stress factors on parents. Parents who themselves were abused and those with substance abuse problems add to the risk, Crocker said.

But the other part of the picture is that public spending as a percentage of state and federal budgets on children services has been declining for 20 years. One of the proposals before the congressional supercommittee would cut Head Start funding, including a home visit component. Child care funding has dropped over the years.

European nations spend their money devoted to children on programs serving those in the first five years of life. In the U.S., Crocker said, the majority is spent on children 14-18, too late for intervention.

One way more can be done, Crocker believes, is for community-based groups to cooperate instead of compete for limited funds. And programs that have evidence showing they work should be first in line to get the money.

Abused children don’t lobby government for funding for such programs. But protecting them from abuse is a government function as essential as any.

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Anonymous

“According to a recent congressional report, a child in the U.S. dies from abuse or neglect every five hours.” – Absolutely inexcusable and heartbreaking…
Lori Handrahan

Dear BDN please see: http://lorihandrahan.com/2011/11/15/who-is-dean-crocker/

Dean Crocker, whom you cite here, has just released a report that protects a child abuser, a criminal alien from former Yugoslavia who was substantiated for sex abuse of his daughter, Ila at age 2. Dean Crocker’s report is rife with provable, documented lies. Why would Dean Crocker protect a child abuser?

Mila is my daughter. I have not seen her since May 10 of this year although I hold joint custody. Judge Moskowitz has refused to enforce the court order or hold Mila’s fater in contempt. Indeed, state officials from the top down all seem to be protecting a criminal alien and not a small child and her Maine state, US Citizen, law-abiding mother. Why?

Please see Saving Mila Social Media Campaign. Nearly 13,000 hits in 10 days.

http://www.facebook.com/savingmila
http://www.lorihandrahan.com
Anonymous

BDN please stop using that photo unless you have the family’s permission.
Anonymous

Too bad this country didn’t feel the same way about abortion. Do you ever notice fewer and fewer children with Down Syndrome? It’s not by accident.
Anonymous

It’s because gays are ruining marriage, of course. (sarcasm)
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_NXPTPFL746OV2VGR5WBOEUF6W4 Roger

Well this is a direct result of the nothing is your fault mentality. We tell kids in school not to worry nothing is your fault. We do not keep score to avoid hurt feelings. Then we say you should not have sex but at the same time hand out condoms. Then if you do get pregnant don’t worry it is not your fault so we will pay your way as it would be wrong to expect you to accept you made a mistake and make you accept responsibility for your actions and care for the child both in terms of parenting and financially responsibility.

Then on top of that we do not punish those who do bad things. We talk about it and demand it but in the end it is not there fault they did something bad so we send them to a mental ward or simply give them a scolding and send them home.

However horrible many of us find these things until we as a society star to hold people responsible for there actions and are willing to actually punish those who do wrong we will continue ion this light.

Personally I am one who has a firm belief that those who harm children do not deserve a second chance. You intentionally cause harm to a child you should spend the rest of your days in a very small uncomfortable cell or be executed. Those are the only two ways to positively ensure the offender never does it again. To many folks think that is far to harsh though..
Anonymous

Let’s face it, if every prospective parent had to go through the same process of adoptive parents, we’d have far fewer parents. But who’s to tell? Some people start out as lousy parents, then get better. Others with great promise turn out to be duds.
Anonymous

wow..what ignorance
Anonymous

It should be “all right,” not “alright.”
Anonymous

What do you expect when we pay the irresponsible for having more babies?
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_SHNOU64ZBOBIKWUF5IM6WSH7WA entitled4life

American’s are selfish, inconsiderate and disrespectful of others. Having a child compromises those values. If you are one of the many that cannot get enough of yourself, do one unselfish thing in your life and do not have a child.
Anonymous

You are absolutely correct, fwteagles! My straight brother’s 5 marriages have nothing to do with ruining marriage.
Anonymous

Going through the same process as adoptive parent’s is NO better. More children are abused and die in foster care and after being adopted than children left in their own homes, per The National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect in Washington (NCCAN). Recent numbers have increased significantly for CPS. PERPETRATORS OF MALTREATMENT ~ CPS COMES IN AS NUMBER 1 AGAIN! http://www.childrensdefense.org

*Perpetrators of Maltreatment* Physical Abuse: CPS 160 Parents 59 Sexual Abuse: CPS 112 Parents 13 Neglect: CPS 410 Parents 241 Medical Neglect:CPS 14 Parents 12 Fatalities: CPS 6.4 Parents 1.5 Imagine that, 6.4 children die at the hands of the very agencies that are supposed to protect them and only 1.5 at the hands of parents per 100,000 children. CPS perpetrates more abuse, neglect, and sexual abuse and kills more children then parents in the United States. CPS nationwide is GUILTY OF more human rights violations and CHILD CASUALTIES then the homes from which they were removed.
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_SHNOU64ZBOBIKWUF5IM6WSH7WA entitled4life

No one in a position that can do something about this cares. It would facilitate reviewing the material and making a decision and bureaucrats will have none of that.
Guest

Sarcastic. . . yes. Amusing or appropriate . . . not hardly.
Anonymous

Is not hardly like a double negative?
Anonymous

Well, just look at the generation who raised this generation of parents.
Anonymous

At least he’s still got faith in the institution:-)
Anonymous

Please check your statistics, the US has the highest pecentage of incarcerated citizens in the world, our capital punishment stats are up there with China and Saudi Arabia. Your lack of punishment argument is completely baseless and false.
Harry H Snyder III

“Crocker said, the majority is spent on children 14-18, too late for intervention.”

This statement is too ludicrous for words. For forty years children in their teens have been coming to my home. They come from reform schools, mental health facilities, residential treatment facilities other foster homes and the streets. By the time they get to my door they have usually been bounced out of everywhere else.

The vast majority of them go on to have useful productive lives. 14, 16, & 18 year olds are worth the effort.

BTW I have heard some people say that after three is “too late”

The BDN of today has NO credibility on the subject of child welfare. My subscription runs out in March.
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_NXPTPFL746OV2VGR5WBOEUF6W4 Roger

Are there folks locked up sure. That has nada to so with my point. just last week in BDN a great story about a guy who just had is 12th DUI. Read the stories about the folks busted for drugs and read how many are out on bail or on parole then look at there history. Check out almost every child molester and ask how come they where not already in jail for the last kid the went after?

Better yet ignore everything I said. Go to your local PD and ask the sheriff or chief how many times they arrest the same people for the same things over and over only to have to court tell them ” do not do that again” and send them home. Ask them they will tell you. I have a very good relationship with the local pd’s. They are very quick to tell you the problems they face.

Then if you still think there locking up the people that need to be next time you get some time off work go to your local court and juts sit and listen ( yes you can do this and it is very educational ) listen to what people are charged with and watch how fast they go home. Sure they may get a fine some get probation some even get jail but not much.

You live in Maine I am guessing. here is another one that will wake you up like a bucket of ice water poured on your head at 3 am. Call Next Step. Ask them how many women killed in Maine where killed by someone who was arrested countless times for assaulting the woman they killed. In Maine if you beat a woman your in a relationship with or had one with unless you kill them or cause serious damage you will get off without jail the majority of the time. If you real bad but did not kill her I broke a few bones in her face and maybe a arm then your may get 30 days!

Make a few calls talk to some Le’s cause you have little understanding of what is really going on. As I stated do not take my word for it. If you can only call one place call Next Step and ask them or go meet some of the people who volunteer there to help these women try to deal with these matters. But until you see a woman who boyfriend has heat her repeatedly in front of her kids and calls 911 the cops show up and take the guy away then she has to fill out papers to get a restraining order then the woman has to go to court in front of strangers and the guy who beat her in front of her kid or kids and convince the judge he is a danger to her. Then if she does get the restraining order and the abuser is the father of the kids then he still gets visitation with them! Then months later the lady has to return to court and go through a horrible process of defending herself. Only to be told the majority of the time that the guy will do 30 days if any and when he gets out he gets to come back and visit the kids!

http://www.nextstepdvproject.org
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F7VMUU5NIDG3Y2AUPJUMBJY7B4 JEFF

I would guarantee that most parents convicted of abuse did not think as a young child that they thought”when I get married and or have children I will beat them senseless,withhold their food and water,sexually assault them,and or totally neglect their needs.There are a multitude of factors that make these cases arrive at this point. some of the most horrific tales featured in the media are in fact are are small potatoes compared to all the cases that never meet the medias sensationalized criteria and go unreported for decades.
http://www.infowars.com Pat Riote

You’re only looking at the rabbit hole. The deeper you go, the more you will find.

Go do a web search on “boystown nebraska scandal” and that is only the beginning.
http://www.infowars.com Pat Riote

“And more parents are alone than ever before.”

So bring back family values? Get married before having sex? Accept Jesus into your life? I don’t know, but something positive that has a lasting effect.
http://www.facebook.com/tom.harvell Tom Harvell

I don’t disagree that we may have a problem but statements like “In fact, the United States has the highest rate of child abuse in the world.” are just silly. Many Many countries in africa, south america, and asia do take good statistics about issues like this. Consider children in Africa that are forced into the military at the ripe old age of 7 or 8.
Anonymous

I’m well aware of the Boystown scandal. Adoptive parent’s are NO better than Bio parent’s and are in many tomes much worse. It’s not up to the govt. to pick and choose parent’s. They don’t have a crystal ball telling them who would make a better parent even though they proclaim they can see “Neglect in the Future”. Should a child be removed from his/her parent’s because our govt. hires CPS/DCYF worker’s who claim they can see into the future? Not on your life, but it’s happening right now!
Harry H Snyder III

…. Money and fancy programs are NOT answers to lowering rates of child abuse. Bangladesh and Mexico both have lower rates of parental child abuse than the USA.
Anonymous

Sometimes a parent just needs a break, maybe some quality time away from mommy with Rev. Bob is the answer..
http://www.infowars.com Pat Riote

Makes me happy to know that you’ve heard of the Boystown scandal. Most people I talk to say “the boystown what?”
Anonymous

The people that haven’t heard about the scandal are people who have not yet been affected by the destruction of CPS. No-one pays attention until they are caught in this nasty web.
Steve Anderson

Since when do we “pay the irresponsible for having more babies”? Are you referring to those “welfare queens” who have hundreds of babies so they can collect more and more welfare? Um, you’re aware that those don’t actually exist, right?
Steve Anderson

*facepalm*

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