There’s no reason to leave your baby behind for a family meal on the town — if you have the right game plan, that is. Check out these pointers from our parenting expert Tammy Gold, founder of Gold Parent Coaching, and you and your baby can enjoy your favorite restaurant together in no time.
TIP 1: MENTAL PREP
First, know what you’re getting into. “The key to a smooth dinner is parent prep,” Gold says. Decide what your child is ready for, anticipate what could happen (tantrum, diaper explosion), determine how to prevent it and know what you’ll do if it happens anyway. Just being ready for these little blips is really half the battle.
TIP 2: LOCATION
“Look for places with lots of space to walk around,” Gold says. “This way, you can take a tour of the place before the meal, and maybe a tour while you’re waiting for the food.” This can really help blow off some steam and keep your baby from getting too bored. Look for some interesting distractions, too — maybe there’s a large painting or an aquarium in the restaurant. A playground across the street? Even better. Definitely stay away from places with dim lights and fine crystal. No time to scope? Call to see if they offer high chairs or boosters. If not, they probably aren’t used to tiny patrons.
TIP 3: TIMING
Hungry babies are rarely happy, so definitely work within your child’s schedule. If it’s not possible to actually eat at your baby’s mealtime, Gold recommends feeding the tyke at home and then bringing along a snack as a distraction. If dinner will last through bedtime, consider pulling the stroller right up to the table, and don’t forget any blankies or other bedtime soothers. Try not to make plans that will keep you out late, though. “A 1-year-old can’t go out to dinner at nine,” she says.
TIP 4: TOYS
Most importantly, Gold suggests bringing along a special stock of “restaurant-only” toys, novel goodies that your baby doesn’t get to play with at home or in the car. “Boredom is the biggest trigger of tantrums and bad behavior,” Gold says, explaining that baby’s amusement is all up to you. “If their needs are met, you can meet yours.” And tactile stimulation is best. “Go for small, sturdy books and items with bright colors.” The real trick, though, is to reserve your ammo. “If you have 15 toys and present them all at once, you won’t get very far,” Gold says. Instead, give one at a time, maximizing your time and baby’s attention span. Make the most of the tools you’ve got, and you might even make it to dessert.
TIP 5: SETUP
Be sure to clear away any dangerous items from the table and anything that baby might grab and hurl. Also, take notice of built-in “toys” (especially if your own stash is skimpy). Gold is a strong believer in the power of a few empty plastic cups and says that plastic spoons and jelly packets work great too. For older babies, you can make eating a hands-on project. “Cut up the food. Let them hold it. Let them dip it in the ketchup. These are all ways to lengthen their ability to engage,” she says. And, for the actual seating arrangements, bring along a backup in case the high chairs are all taken. Phil & Teds’ “metoo” portable chair is a great lightweight highchair option, the i’coo Targo and Stokke Xplory strollers lift right up to table height, and the Kaboost portable high chair booster raises a toddler’s restaurant chair to grown-up level.
TIP 6: GO WITH IT
Keeping your baby at bay is seriously an art. “The key is to engage, engage, engage — and then you can have your freedom,” Gold says. In other words, if your baby keeps busy, you can do more eating and chatting, and less retrieving of the sippy cup from three booths over. And if it’s just not working out? Hey, you tried. It can take some serious practice to learn what works best to keep your child engaged and happy. “It might not go the way you planned this time. Or next time,” Gold says. But you’ll get it. And about all those squished fries under the table? Don’t forget to tip.